My dad (3am Ramblings)

This year is off to a weird start. The last few months of 2018 I had been thinking a lot of about my dad, and the fact our relationship hasn't really been there. After all the family members my girls father has lost and the few of my own I've lost it made me start thinking about how that my parents won't be around forever. And when we were are younger we think our parents are bulletproof. And my dad was no different.
I found out he's in the hospital. And it took me a moment to process what my cousin Jessica was telling. My dad in the hospital? The same man how taught me how to use duct tape for a bandaid and told me the best medicine is a shot of vodka or wild turkey will cure anything you got. And its mind over matter. You're only sick if you think you are! She told me he'd fell. Again I'm thinking he fell like some old person?! Not my dad!! I did the math and he's in his 70's now. How the hell did that happen?

Talking to my girls about him earlier today they asked me what are somethings I've learned from him. That is really good question. I've learned some good things and some bad things. My dad is old school as it comes. He didn't believe in hunting, but he loves to fish. He'd take me fishing in the spring and summer when I was younger. He taught me how to use a gun and a knife. He always felt it was important to able to do things for myself. He never treated me like I was handicap or disabled. That is something that holds fast in my mind. He taught me that if I don't know something I need to be smart enough to learn how to find out the information. Book smart is just as important as street smart. He taught me the value of money and the importance of keeping your bills pay.
All good things that have served me well and I've been trying to pass all the little things on to my girls. Though it hasn't always been great life lessons. I know him being old school he didn't parent like someone would now a days. He's always been a hardcore drinker. He never let that stop him from working or do anything he really wanted to do, but in the same token when he was drunk it made him a totally different person. And because of that it put a fear in me that if I drank I'd turn into the kind of person he is. Both my parents are mean drunks or can be.
He's never sugar coated things with me. He's very much into telling you like it is. He'd give you the shirt off his back and his last dime if he knew it could help you. Helping others was a value he taught me early on.

When I think of him there are a few things what always come to mind. Him being a truck driver most of my life. Growing up he listen to a lot of different music. From Hank Williams to B.B King. I believe those are his favorites to listen to. I grew up listening to oldies and bluegrass music. Him growing up in the 30's I'm kind of jealous of him. He got to hear all the good music first. He's actually the one who named me. My named me after a Clint Eastwood movie 'Play Misty For Me!' if you have never watched the movie it's about a DJ that had a stalker. Normally I wouldn't think he'd watch that kind of movie, but Clint was in it anything with him or John Wayne in it and my dad was totally into it. When I was a teenager I saved up money one year for Christmas and got him all of John Wayne's movies. I couldn't wait to see the look on his face when he opened his gift that year. He'd just got himself a new VHS and DVD player. He had no idea how to hook it up. He told me it was my job to figure it out when he came to get me. And normally anything techy like that he left up to me to hook up and show me how to use. When he opened his gift the look on his face was priceless. He was shocked and along with the John Wayne movies I got him 'Play Misty For Me', 'Every Which Way but Loose', and 'Dirty Harry.'

I think he was shocked that I paid attention to the things he liked. It's amazing the things we learn or stick around from our parents. He use to have a cassette tape in his van of Believe by Cher. My favorite song on it was Taxi, Taxi. I don't know why that song sticks out to most. Just another weird thing I guess. I hope he gets better soon and that'll call me. I would like to rebuild our relationship if not for myself, than for my girls. I think they could learn a lot from their grandpa.